Power of Choice Part 2: Exercise the Power of Choice

“Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.” - William Jennings Bryan

I talked about the Power of Choice in my previous article. In this one, I intend to list out how you can ‘Exercise’ the Power of Choice.

You may not be able to control or choose all the circumstances that occur in life but you can, for sure, control and choose how you perceive those circumstances and respond to them. You can do this by exercising the power of choice. Here’s how you can Exercise the Power of Choice.

Be proactive not reactive. Do not be influenced by your environment, past, or people surrounding you so much so that you just become a remote-controlled prop and start reacting when anything/anyone pushes the buttons on the remote. Choose not to get affected by the way others look at you or treat you because what the other person thinks or talks about is none of your business. Even if you have suffered a setback, choose to be okay! Life has a brighter side and you can choose to experience it! Rather than simply reacting to life and whining about what difficulties it has thrown at you, you can instead choose to count your blessings, feel strong and make a choice to be happy. Take the remote control in your own hands: take charge of your feelings, thoughts and responses.  No one else can do this for you. You have to do it for your own well being. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

Be internally driven. Many of us base our happiness and sorrows on things that happen to us rather than taking charge of our reactions. We base our self-worth on how we measure up to the expectations of the society, our parents, our partners, our peers and our siblings too at times. We start to undermine our worth and feel that we don’t have control. We attribute our failures and successes to external circumstances. This is termed as having an external locus of control. This extraneous locus is something you have to get rid of. Here’s an anecdote, though drastically cut short, I hope it drives the point home. A trainer held up a $100 note and asked how many want it. A lot of hands went up in the audience. He then crumpled the note and stamped it under his feet and again asked ‘who wants it now’? Many hands still went up. It was still a $100 note no matter what! So there you go, no matter what circumstances you face, how people treat you, your failures and setbacks; your worth always remains intact. You are what you believe you are. You have the control to change things the way you want them! Have confidence and be internally driven.

Be responsible. Life is eventually a sum total of the choices that you make. This implies that whatever you do or what happens to you is just your sole responsibility. You are responsible for your state of mind, your actions and ultimately your successes and failures in life. “Be ‘response able’. We are not animals. We are not a product of what has happened to us in our past. We have the power of choice says Stephen Covey”. Take control of your thoughts, emotions and choose your responses. The choices that you make will slowly add up to frame your destiny.

Be conscious. Being aware is the one thing that God has blessed all Homo sapiens with. No other species can observe themselves like we can. We have the power to reinvent ourselves. In Awareness or Consciousness lie many answers that you have been seeking. Read Awareness. Being conscious about the options in front of you and possible outcomes they may have in future gives you the much required strength to exercise the power of choice. Even if you’ve made some bad ones in the past, it’s not the end of life. Visit your past and contemplate why and how. Once you have deduced that, make conscious efforts not to repeat the same mistakes again. Just be conscious/aware that you have the power to choose. Weigh your options, visualize the possible outcomes and take an informed decision.

Practice can make anything perfect. Practice is what will help you widen the ‘space’ between the stimulus and response that I have spoken about in my previous article.  Once you start being proactive, internally driven, aware and start choosing your responses wisely, you will keep on getting better at it. The more you practice, the better you will get. The power of choice is so empowering that there comes a stage where your responses would have the potential to actually change the stimulus itself.

Remember “What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life. - Leo Buscaglia”

Cheers!