New Year…New Game Plan!

Why plan?

Each year we turn a new chapter in our lives. New beginnings call for new plans and new resolutions. As human beings we owe it to ourselves to improve each day. New Year represents a perfect timing to chart out the ways we want to improve ourselves, be it by planning for a career move or learning a new skill like a new language or swimming. In that direction, out of personal experience I can say with confidence that planning things out does give oneself some perspective of where you stand and where you want to get to. The ‘go with the flow’ attitude towards life takes you just as far as what chance has in store, and more often than not we regret not doing certain things that we should have. Imagine yourself in a sea, just drifting based on the current of the waves. Where would you get to?! In my opinion, this is similar to a life without any plans to follow or goals to reach. Planning life ahead helps one prepare mentally for the tussle and discipline required for reaching one’s goals.

Goal setting!

Some would say ‘I do not want to waste time in planning as I never follow what I plan’! Mind you this is not lack of motivation, resistance to change, or a commitment issue at all. The reason why you took out time to plan instead of spending it doing something else is because you are prepared for change and because you think you would be committed to bring out those changes in your life. I would identify the failure to follow plans as loophole in the goal setting process. It is of paramount importance to set achievable goals. There’s got be a realistic view of your circumstances and your capabilities while planning; only then is it possible to keep yourself motivated to reach your goals. We all must have heard about setting SMART goals, i.e., goals should be Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time bound.

Give yourself ample thinking space and time while setting goals and planning. If carefully done, this could be your blueprint for implementing successful changes that you have always wanted to achieve. Get into details of the what, when, and how. Visualise and imagine the small things in your journey; starting from how would you feel when you achieve your goal and then work your way backwards to where you are now. Imagine your journey to get to your goals, work out the tasks that you would have to factor in to get there and finally put all of it on paper. It is a good helpful technique to display your goals in your work area or home to reinforce them day in and day out.

Way ahead…

Once you have made plans whatever they may be, big or small, just keep in mind the following while trudging towards them. I am going to quote a few famous sayings and/or my interpretation of them in the text below, simply for the reason that they perfectly sum up in few words the shifts in thinking patters that we need to achieve to get to our targets.

Albert Einstein said “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. If you want to achieve different results in any realm, change the way you approach it. Research and reinvent.

Never look back. What was was in the past! Do not let the events that happened in the past restrict you from achieving your goals in the future. Let go of what happened in the past, let go of the why not’s and the should have’s and look ahead. That’s where you would find success.  

Dreams are turned into reality by acting on them. To dream and plan is not enough, Action is very important as well. It is you who has the capability to make or break your dreams and aspirations of your perfect life simply by being trapped in the past or by not acting on your plans.

Finally, never mind the setbacks, keep your focus on your goals and move on. Falling seven times is not important, what is important is to have got up the eighth time. Ever seen an ant reach a sugar bottle on the top most shelves, the ant falls several times before it gets up there…never gives up till it reaches its destination! Accept setbacks, use them as learning experiences and move ahead.

Surrender to what is.   Let go of what was.    Have faith in what will be.  -  Sonia Ricotti

Have a happy, healthy and prosperous 2014! J

Cheers!!

So…what are your new year’s resolutions?

Power of Choice Part 2: Exercise the Power of Choice

“Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.” - William Jennings Bryan

I talked about the Power of Choice in my previous article. In this one, I intend to list out how you can ‘Exercise’ the Power of Choice.

You may not be able to control or choose all the circumstances that occur in life but you can, for sure, control and choose how you perceive those circumstances and respond to them. You can do this by exercising the power of choice. Here’s how you can Exercise the Power of Choice.

Be proactive not reactive. Do not be influenced by your environment, past, or people surrounding you so much so that you just become a remote-controlled prop and start reacting when anything/anyone pushes the buttons on the remote. Choose not to get affected by the way others look at you or treat you because what the other person thinks or talks about is none of your business. Even if you have suffered a setback, choose to be okay! Life has a brighter side and you can choose to experience it! Rather than simply reacting to life and whining about what difficulties it has thrown at you, you can instead choose to count your blessings, feel strong and make a choice to be happy. Take the remote control in your own hands: take charge of your feelings, thoughts and responses.  No one else can do this for you. You have to do it for your own well being. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

Be internally driven. Many of us base our happiness and sorrows on things that happen to us rather than taking charge of our reactions. We base our self-worth on how we measure up to the expectations of the society, our parents, our partners, our peers and our siblings too at times. We start to undermine our worth and feel that we don’t have control. We attribute our failures and successes to external circumstances. This is termed as having an external locus of control. This extraneous locus is something you have to get rid of. Here’s an anecdote, though drastically cut short, I hope it drives the point home. A trainer held up a $100 note and asked how many want it. A lot of hands went up in the audience. He then crumpled the note and stamped it under his feet and again asked ‘who wants it now’? Many hands still went up. It was still a $100 note no matter what! So there you go, no matter what circumstances you face, how people treat you, your failures and setbacks; your worth always remains intact. You are what you believe you are. You have the control to change things the way you want them! Have confidence and be internally driven.

Be responsible. Life is eventually a sum total of the choices that you make. This implies that whatever you do or what happens to you is just your sole responsibility. You are responsible for your state of mind, your actions and ultimately your successes and failures in life. “Be ‘response able’. We are not animals. We are not a product of what has happened to us in our past. We have the power of choice says Stephen Covey”. Take control of your thoughts, emotions and choose your responses. The choices that you make will slowly add up to frame your destiny.

Be conscious. Being aware is the one thing that God has blessed all Homo sapiens with. No other species can observe themselves like we can. We have the power to reinvent ourselves. In Awareness or Consciousness lie many answers that you have been seeking. Read Awareness. Being conscious about the options in front of you and possible outcomes they may have in future gives you the much required strength to exercise the power of choice. Even if you’ve made some bad ones in the past, it’s not the end of life. Visit your past and contemplate why and how. Once you have deduced that, make conscious efforts not to repeat the same mistakes again. Just be conscious/aware that you have the power to choose. Weigh your options, visualize the possible outcomes and take an informed decision.

Practice can make anything perfect. Practice is what will help you widen the ‘space’ between the stimulus and response that I have spoken about in my previous article.  Once you start being proactive, internally driven, aware and start choosing your responses wisely, you will keep on getting better at it. The more you practice, the better you will get. The power of choice is so empowering that there comes a stage where your responses would have the potential to actually change the stimulus itself.

Remember “What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life. - Leo Buscaglia”

Cheers!